When babies cry, or won’t nurse or take a bottle, or can’t get to sleep despite looking exhausted, Moms blame themselves. Instead, think about the baby.
For the past nine months, your baby has been cozy and warm. He has never had to wait for food. In fact, he’s never had to figure out how to eat food – it just arrives. He has not worn clothes. Since he’s been swimming around in your belly, he has never experienced the jarring feeling of a cold, wet diaper. With such little space these last few weeks, he has never even had to figure out how to stop his limbs from flailing. The light and sounds and smells and feels were more or less constant, calm and relaxing.
And then, welcome to the world little one!
How would you feel?
Yikes! Scary thought! The world is an overwhelming place to new babies. They need to learn how to deal with all this new stuff in their world.
So long as moms respond to baby’s basic needs, like feeding, changing, cuddling, and loving, a lot of crying is about the baby….not about our skills as moms. Remind yourself: “This is not about me. My baby is learning about the world right now, and boy, it’s a challenging place!”
When you look at baby behavior from their point of view, it takes the blame and guilt off you. Focusing less on blame and guilt allows you to focus more on the baby!